WHITE GUY CODE TALK
Did I Just Miss the Signal?
“Got the code book?”
So Minnesota Governor and 2024 Vice-Presidential Candidate Tim Walz said he was picked for the ticket because he could “code talk to white guys.”
“I could code talk to white guys watching football, fixing their truck, doing that, that I could put them at ease,” Walz said at the event Monday.” (The Hill, Walz on why he was picked as Harris running mate: ‘I could code talk to white guys’)
Code Talk? To white guys? Now let me get this straight:
–What is the White Guy Code?
I gotta ask, because I’m so clueless I didn’t know there was one, let alone be able to decode stuff with it.
–Okay, so I’m Celto-American, Irish with a wee bit of Scots. To me, any code would translate…
“Having a nice day?”
Means “Have a drink”
“Nice day today.”
Means: “Have a drink”
“What’s the meaning of life?”
Means “Whiskey or Guiness?”
–But a general White Guy Code? I missed that one when I took the Basic White Guy course in 10th Grade. So maybe the White Guy Code is like this:
“Let’s fix our truck.” Means “White Supremacy Forever!”
“Let’s watch some football.” Means “Up with the Patriarchy Forever!”
“Let’s fix our truck and watch football.” Means “It’s Adolf Hitler’s Birthday, let’s buy a swastika cake.”
–This would do me no good, as I don’t have a truck and until recently the Lions were so bad, watching them would require a prescription for laughing gas so I wouldn’t go kill myself. Or maybe there’s a Secret Decoder Ring, like for Little Orphan Annie. You listened to Hannity, wrote down the numbers, and it came out: “Don’t forget to drink your Budweiser.”
This really isn’t funny. Am I the only white guy who doesn’t know the code? I’d hate to think I voted by mistake.
There was poor old Tim Walz, dressing up like Elmer Fudd to go hunt wabbit, all to give me a permission structure to vote for Kamala Harris and I just missed the message?
Like Bruce Wayne having a martini in the hot tub at Stately Wayne Manor, the Joker goes berserk in Gotham City, they send up the Bat Signal, and… nothing! Batman doesn’t show because he didn’t get the code?
I am feeling so guilty. Like it’s all my fault. But then only 37% of white males voted for Harris. 2024 Post-Election Survey: Racial Analysis of 2024 Election Results
Clearly Tim’s Code Talk missed more folks than me. The wascally white wabbits bounded away. What’s up, doc? But don’t feel bad, Governor Walz. It wasn’t your fault; I totally blame myself.
It was just a Minnesota thing; I wouldn’t understand.